Thankless job?

Here's what a smiling student handed to me last week:

The inevitable!

My school does enrichment clusters, based on the research conducted by Renzulli and Reis. My cluster this time around is Natural Disasters, and of course the children asked immediately if we could build a volcano. They all knew how, and they all knew exactly what would happen. Even so, they wanted to do it.

Last week they built the thing out of sand and glue with a 16 oz. water bottle as the base. Fifteen minutes later I had twelve gooey hands and a table full of water to contend with, along with the expectant faces of children ready to witness the explosion. And

Fast forward to today. The paint came out so they could make the mountain look more realistic, and finally it was time for the eruption. The knowing voices chimed in: "Ok, let's put the water in. Do you think this is warm enough?" "How many drops of food coloring?" "What should we stir this with?" "Ms. M, can I pour the vineger?" "I want to put in the baking soda!!"

At this point I stopped the students. I had read about a different way to add the baking soda and I asked the kids if we should try it. One fifth grader was saying that all it was going to do was bubble over... we've all seen it 1,000 times. What was everyone so excited about? Let's just try it and see if it would make a difference. (I had no idea if it would or wouldn't.)

I explained the new process to the students and J got the scissors and kleenex. We made our little pouches, the kids popped them into the bottle, the requisite orange fizz started bubbling up and....

BOOM!

Orange spray EVERYWHERE! Two feet high, all over the table, all over our shirts, on the floor. Squeals of delight!

The custodians will NOT thank me for this stunt, I'm sure. And as for the parents, they had better hide their food coloring!

For the love of reading

Last weekend some of my colleagues and I went to see the movie Water for Elephants. Three of us had read the book; two of my colleagues hadn't. We all experienced the movie differently.

Later at dinner we talked about reading. I am an avid reader. My shelves are full of books and I cannot walk into a book store without spending half of my paycheck. Seriously, I think I have problems. I use my library card to try to save money... and if I love the book I end up buying it anyway.

One of my colleagues said that she is so tired at night lately that she has been setting her alarm for 4:00 AM just so she can make the time to work through the book she is reading. She loves the book that much. Another colleague was shocked by this. She said she has never been so absorbed by a book. She has never stayed up all night to finish a book. Ever.

Never? The four of us were floored.

This particular colleague does not hold read-aloud as a sacred, untouchable part of her school day. Now I can see why. One who has never experienced a love of reading first hand cannot write it as a learning objective for students.

Excitement in the classroom (or lack thereof...)

I've been thinking a lot lately about student engagement, because really that is the major piece that is missing in my classroom this year. It feels like a personal blow because engaging the learner has always been a strength of mine. Not so much this year. It seems that no matter what the topic, no matter how I present it, no matter what the activity... to the students it feels like gruntwork. They don't say it out loud, but the message comes across loud and clear. Our conversations lack depth and on some days it feels like I am pulling teeth just to get them to repeat the learning objective, or the instructions - let alone make connections to their personal experiences, to prior learning, or to the bigger world. Instead I hear groans of disbelief when I require a capital letter at the beginning of a sentence, or when I take them outside for a science investigation and don't allow them to run amok. Their confidence level is almost nonexistent, and I know that contributes to their disinterest. It's almost as if some have given up on school altogether.

It is so disheartening.

There have been some moments of excitement, of course. Here are a few that we've had in recent weeks:

• We are writing folk tales based on traditional Native American and African animal tales (Why Mosquitos Buzz in People's Ears, How the Chipmunk Got Its Stripes). The students are publishing in the way that feels most natural to them, and there is a lovely productive buzz in the classroom during writer's workshop as some are rapping with Garage Band, some are designing comics, some setting the stage for their plays, and some choreographing dances.


• I challenged them recently to turn the impossible into the possible, and they worked in teams to get across the gym without touching the floor with any part of their bodies. It tested their collaborative skills and their thinking skills, and though many felt discouraged their excitement and determination kept them engaged.


• We are doing an author study about Chris Van Allsburg. I love his books, and have been reading a book a day aloud to the class. I started out by having the children sit back and enjoy his writing and added a new listening/thinking challenge each day. By about book seven or eight students were jumping out of their seats at the end of the story to talk about impossible happenings, time lapses, and themes.


• Recently I began blogging with my students. They have been so excited about posting their thoughts online! When we're in the lab they are up and on one another's computers to show one another how to post and comment, and they are calling across the room, "I just commented on yours, can you see it?" "Ms. M, you didn't approve it yet, hurry up!" Some of the other teachers in my building have commented as well, and the students have been pleasantly surprised to find support in unexpected places.

I realize these are just small successes, and maybe the thinking should be so much bigger by now and the learning so much deeper. I guess for my own sanity I have to remember where we began as a class back in August and realize that while the successes are small, at least we have moved forward. Still I want so badly for them to LOVE school, and for them to see the bigger picture.

Beware of the Book

Last fall, I began working toward an advanced degree. The demands of academia have rocked my world this year, and the coursework itself is stretching my thinking and causing me to challenge my practice in ways I never imagined. It's exhausting, but pretty awesome at the same time. One of my courses this quarter is about finding a direct link between curriculum theory and practice. This week the assignment was to create some aspect of a curricular unit based on the ideas of the multicultural and critical theorists (Nieto, Ladson-Billings, Friere, Giroux, Apple, Banks, etc.).

When I thought about representations and student voice, my mind immediately went to banned and challenged literature. For years I have made a point of looking at the American Library Association lists and following the AS IF blogs and debates. I own a tall stack of commonly banned and challenged books, and I strongly believe that those are some of the most important books for young adults because they delve into the issues and identities that exist in real life.... and so I decided to create a list. A short list of books that represent contemporary life, to serve as a resource for those who work with young adults.

I included books that cover a wide range of topics and issues such as truancy, drug use, sexuality, privilege, victimization, racism, religious and cultural conflict, and family relations because those are the issues teenagers see and feel but are not always able to talk about. Books that explore the topics of eating disorders and date rape, while uncomfortable to read, can provide solace for a young adult who has gone through a similar experience, or information for a friend or parent trying to help a loved one. Books that touch on homosexuality show that it is a normal part of a person's identity and for a teenager who feels awkward and unconventional like Charlie in the perks of being a wallflower, that book can be a vital source of support. Especially with the adolescent suicide rates rising, I believe that it is crucial to put books by Brent Hartinger and similar authors into children's hands. The letters these authors receive from young adults are testaments to the importance of books that represent multiple identities and experiences.

I also included books that might begin to open a dialogue about stereotypes. The book Monster is about an African American teenager who is convicted of robbery simply because he was standing in front of the store when it happened (though as readers we never find out the "real" story of why he was there, which allows us to examine our perceptions). The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian not only shows a snapshot of life on a reservation, but also an insider's take on poverty. The other books on my list include characters from many different countries, cultures, religions, and faiths, and all different socioeconomic levels, urban, suburban, and rural communities, public and private schools, abusive families, cohesive families, no family, and even foster care. The perspectives and life outlooks portrayed through the characters are as diverse as the characters themselves, and I think it's important for children to see those representations in literature - not only to find connections in the stories they read, but also to gain a new perspective about those around them.

That said, it is important for teachers, librarians, and parents to keep conversations open in order to hear children's thoughts and opinions, and also to help them realize that one voice does not represent an entire population.

This is the reading list I came up with. I welcome any and all comments about books I could have or should have included, and also about books I should not have included.

This class I teach.

This class I teach is filled with children who live lives I will never fully know or understand. I have to accept them for who they are and what they bring as they enter our space - and be ready for anything on any given day: happy and sad and angry and confused, filthy and clean and hungry and unkempt and tired and alert and kissed/hugged and satisfied and filled with dreams and ideas and ready or not ready to face the day ahead.

The dynamics that play out in my classroom are as predictable as the day is long; these children have been together since first grade. The first grade teacher struggled, the second grade teacher nearly gave up, the third grade teacher left the profession, and now they are with me in fourth grade. The structure of my school is such that this group will stay together until they go off to middle school - and so here I am with this class I teach.

At the beginning of the school year I began as I always do: rituals and routines, community building, proactive social teaching. I tried to be more intentional than in other years, in response to both the reputation they arrived with and the issues that immediately presented themselves. My administrator's words were encouraging: "Don't be afraid to ask for help."

When the first patterns of nitpicking surfaced, I problem-solved in the classroom and role-played in morning meetings, talking with students about how to handle situations. When different situations began - work avoidance, bullying, minor disruptions - I continued to problem solve and document but a few weeks in I sought help. I was then called into the administrator's office, only to be told that the children were "taking advantage of my good will" and that I needed to stop being so "empathetic" and begin teaching. These kids were behind - they needed instruction, not all of this class meeting, social curriculum stuff.

And so I heeded the advice. I bucked up and taught - I did away with the morning meetings and buckled down to the business of curriculum and instruction. Fast forward to now, to this class I teach. To the extreme bullying situations, to the climate of distrust: so much so that I will not leave my room without locking it even for a moment for fear of having something stolen from myself or from one of the students. To the constant disruptions, the level of disrespect toward myself and one another and the nuances that exist within that disrespect. The learning lost, the discomfort I feel arriving at work each day. The fact that I feel there is no one to turn to in my building who can offer anything except for an encouraging (yet unhelpful) "hang in there!"

I am almost a decade into my practice and never have I felt so ineffective as a teacher. My frustration is transparent, I know I am visibly rattled, I cannot help but talk about it because I care so deeply about my teaching and especially about each and every student and I feel so defeated... and yet, I came to a realization last night. I know now that back in September when I asked for help and was instead reprimanded, I walked away from that meeting and took my administration's directive without question, ignoring what I know in my heart about teaching and learning. Ignoring my core beliefs about children. I spent half a school year allowing this class I teach to slip out from under me.

I have three months to get them back.
All is not lost.

One of those days...

It is Monday. I've always had an aversion to Mondays. It is early in the school year. A perfect combination for a not-so-perfect day. Today was one of those days that happens once at most in a school year, if I'm lucky.

My copies for the first homework packet of the year did not get finished (originals lost somewhere in the shuffle I think) and though I could have sent home just today's recommended homework, I want the packet to be intact this week. I want the students and families to know what the routine will be.

Two of my planned lessons fell through this afternoon. Not because of my teaching methods, not because of assemblies or fire drills or lack of student engagement, but because of missing materials. The trade book I needed for our writing lesson is missing, and I discovered this minutes before the students returned from lunch. Yikes! Lesson scrapped, rewritten on the fly! That never feels quite right. Later in the afternoon I discovered that the curriculum guide for our social studies lesson (which contains today's copies) was sitting on a colleague's kitchen table. She had borrowed it for the weekend. Another lesson, recreated on a moment's notice.

I have a student teacher this year. Even though I finished the day frazzled - and of course trying my best not to let it affect the students' day - I like to hope it served as a lesson for her. Even after years of teaching, we can still have days like that. Even after hours of planning and crafting, sometimes the floor drops out.

Here's to a better tomorrow!

Diamond Willow

Recently I read a review of Diamond Willow by Helen Frost and I just had to see for myself. It's about a twelve year-old girl named Willow who experiences all of the normal insecurities of adolescence. She lives in rural Alaska and wants her independence. Willow begs her parents to allow her to venture to her grandparents' house alone with the dogsled. When they finally give in, Willow is elated. She hooks up the dogs and is on her way. Willow makes it there okay, but on the way back home something terrible happens.

This story is told mostly in Willow's voice, and Frost wrote it in an interesting way. Each page of prose is written to look like a diamond, with a hidden message in bold print. Through the other voices that tell the story, Frost presents a whole new perspective about the intelligence and wisdom of animals. I loved this book, and can't wait to share it with my fourth graders!

This makes me smile

This is my friend Tessa's son. He is not quite four years old.



Teachers in Vermont, watch out!

Seeing a child this young reading independently brings about so many questions. The biggest for me is, how do some children naturally pick it up while others face so many hurdles? It helps that Tessa is a rockstar mom and she TALKS WITH HER KIDS. Their home is full of books, paper, crayons, train sets and dinosaurs and all kinds of toys that encourage creative energy... but so many homes have that in place and their children still struggle as readers. What are we missing?

The Invention of Hugo Cabret

It took me a long time to pick up this book. I have to admit, it was because of its size!

But once I opened it, I was pleasantly surprised. This 500+ page book has over 200 pages of pictures! Chapter book? Yes. Graphic novel? Not quite. The Invention of Hugo Cabret by Brian Selznick reads more like a silent film than anything else. A series of pictures, then some storyline, then more pictures. It's fitting, since old time movies play such a huge role in this book. But this beautiful tale is more about Hugo himself. Hugo is an orphan boy who lives in a train station in Paris and maintains the clocks. He makes his way through life the best he can, until an old man catches him stealing from his toy shop. Then things get much more complicated...

Chains

As a reader, I love books that are straightforward, honest, and gritty. In fact, I seek them out. I love historical fiction most of all, especially when it allows us to see the ugly, truthful side of humanity. Chains by Laurie Halse Anderson does just that. Through Isabel's powerful story of struggle and survival, I not only found myself engrossed to the point of missing a couple of meals, but I also learned a great deal about New York City during the Revolutionary War. The realities of being somebody's property, the cruelties, the living conditions, the raging fire I never knew about, the human side of being a Patriot or Loyalist, the medical procedures... so many tiny details embedded in so much research. Wow!

As a fourth grade teacher, I might not add this to my public class shelf. I would keep it on my sought-after personal book shelf for the day when a child needs just the right book. A child who is mature enough, and interested enough to see slavery as it truly was, and war as it truly is.

Jack Adrift

I love books of short stories. You can read just one story, or you can read cover to cover. Jack Adrift by Jack Gantos is such a fun book of short stories! Each story chronicles an adventure Jack Henry had in fourth grade, and each story easily stands alone. Even the title pages have their own stories (in cursive!) that stand alone. And yet, the entire book tells a bigger story about Jack's struggles and triumphs throughout that year.

In typical Jack Gantos fashion, the descriptions are stomach turning. On page 7, younger brother Pete gets carsick and Gantos somehow manages to describe the vomit as both 'pretty' and 'toxic' at the same time. This book will have you laughing at Jack's clever antics and cheering him on as he struggles to get out of sticky situations.

Standardized and norm-referenced...

Enough said.

Rechargeable batteries?

We are less than halfway through our state mandated test in my fourth grade classroom. The kids are working so hard, they are beginning to feel defeated, and their emotions are on overdrive. I realized this afternoon after consoling H and J (and nearly breaking down myself as I explained that it's ok that they ran out of time and said how proud I am of them), after G of all people sobbed twice before lunch and once after, after good friends J and F almost lost their cool on the basketball court...

They are completely drained, and they do not know how to deal with their feelings right now. We sat in a circle and compared our bodies to batteries. I identified the indicators of a draining battery. "If your brain is feeling tired, if you are getting upset or angry more easily than usual, if you are sleeping differently - those are signs that your battery is low." As they indicated their personal battery levels and they saw that their classmates also pointed to their shins, I could hear a collective sigh of relief. They opened up and talked about their nightmares, their jitters, and all of the other things they thought were abnormal. I told them to practice empathy toward their friends, and we talked about how to 'recharge' our batteries when we feel drained.

It was a great conversation, but I wish it didn't have to happen. I just don't think it should be 'normal' for a bunch of nine year-olds to feel this much stress.

Beauty

Beauty by Bill Wallace was published in 1988, but it may as well have been written yesterday.

Luke's dad took off, and his mom was just trying to make ends meet. She got laid off from her job in Denver, and had no choice except to move in with Luke's grumpy grandfather in Oklahoma. Not the best situation! Luckily for Luke, his grandfather runs a ranch with horses and cows, and there is always something to do. Luke finds an unlikely friend in Beauty, a gentle old horse with a funny personality.

This is a story about friendship, but it is also the story of how Luke came to terms with his parents' divorce, and his father's absence.

Billy Hooten: Owlboy

The Guys Read book club at my school is reading Billy Hooten: Owlboy by Tom Sniegoski. I reluctantly borrowed the book from Kyle so I could talk with my students about it as they prepare for their next meeting.

I have to say, it was AWESOME! For anyone who has dreamed of being a superhero, this is your book. Last week I read chapter 1 to Paolo and Jordy as a way to introduce the book and help them get a feel for the author's voice. By the end of the chapter, I think the entire class was listening in, and they were clamoring for the book! The two boys were so excited to be the first to read it, and they are absolutely loving the book.

Billy is a normal kid who has normal problems at school and home... and everything changes for him once he answers a call for help coming from the cemetary. This book has such a realistic feeling to it, and yet it literally has an underground fantasy world! I'm so excited that it's part of a series, because once kids read the first book I think they will be hooked.

How to Steal a Dog

I just finished reading aloud How to Steal a Dog by Barbara O'Connor to my afternoon group. I had never read it before, and WOW. The students broke into applause when it was finished, and they were so impressed with Georgina's honesty in the end. They, like Georgina, didn't even care about the money after all was said and done.

How might I sell this book to kids? (She steals a dog; doesn't that sell itself?!)

Georgina is a girl whose family is going through some tough times. She, her mom, and her brother live in her mom's car and have to clean up at restaurants and gas stations because they don't even have their own bathroom. Georgina realizes that her family is in desperate need of money, so she cooks up this plan to steal a dog and collect the reward money. The reward money would be enough to get an apartment. Seems like the perfect idea, right?

Well...

Important Things

Here's a quote I found today at Creative Literacy:

"There's no such thing as the perfect lesson, the perfect day in school or the perfect teacher. For teachers and students alike, the goal is not perfection but persistence in the pursuit of understanding important things." (Tomlinson and McTighe)

There are so many 'important things' I teach my students every day. Like how to choose an appropriate book, how to decide what to write about, how to break down words into parts, how figure out an author's voice, or a main idea... how to make an inference, how to craft a piece of writing, how to have a friendly discussion, how to sharpen a pencil, how to organize a notebook, and on and on.

But when I really think about it, what are the most important things I want my students to understand this year? What do I want them to leave my classroom this summer with?

• Reading is the most important gift you can give yourself.
• Curiosity is a wonderful gift, too.
• Don't be afraid to ask big questions. Don't be afraid to ask little questions, either.
• It's okay if you don't know everything, or don't have all the answers.
• Mistakes are learning opportunities.
• Your peers can teach you as much as any teacher, book, or website.
• Kindness is so much more effective than cruelty.

What others would you add?

Small Successes

I have been thinking a lot lately about my students as readers. Their strengths and needs as learners of course, but also their level of engagement. I remember clearly Nancie Atwell's message: put wonderful books in kids' hands. Make those books impossible to resist. Children learn best when they are engaged (duh!), and our first and greatest challenge is to get struggling readers to fall in love with books.

I observed my students a lot during the last couple of weeks, looking for ways I can engage them further as readers. Finally this week I conducted a 'reading engagement' survey, which Carol sent to me after I read her post about nurturing kids' reading hearts.


It was interesting to look through the completed surveys this morning. Most of my students feel pretty connected with reading, and most of their responses were positive. I was pleasantly surprised by the number of students who feel that they are able to talk about their favorite books, genres, authors. They confirmed my assumption that they love read aloud time. And of course I found some opportunities for improvement.
The biggest one is their sense of a reading 'future' - most of my students responded that they do not have any sort of wait list for books. I thought about myself as a reader - I have an entire book case full of "someday" books, and an extensive list of books I plan to buy or check out from the library. Why have I never shared that with my students? Why have I never explicitly modeled this very important habit - beyond showing sneak previews of our 'next' read aloud book?

That aside, I know we have something to celebrate. I remember in August I felt so sad about my afternoon group. The first weeks of school, they were so apathetic toward books, toward read aloud time, toward reading in general. I read so many books to them, and conducted so many book talks - I was enthusiastic almost to the point of exhaustion. My goodness, I even broke out lyrics and sang with them to get them reading! It took months to get them to read independently, to get books in their hands that they truly enjoyed. One student finally began reading (and loving!) a book last week. As I read through their surveys, it dawned on me that we have come so far. This class revealed that they don't want to quit when reading time is over, that they feel proud of themselves for reading for longer periods of time, they have favorite authors and series of books now. They look forward to read aloud time. (In fact, they stop me at 3:15 and make sure we don't miss read-aloud time!) Back in August, I couldn't even imagine this group of students saying they loved to read.

We have a long way to go. But I can't discount the small successes they shared with me this week.

Budding Authors

I've spent the majority the day grading student writing. The students have been working on their stories for weeks. They created characters, put those characters into sticky situations, plotted out story mountains with escalating problems, drafted stories and worked all of their ideas into a 'believable world' ... and finally we had the chance to celebrate all of this hard work at school on Friday. Their stories are about sibling rivalry, teen crushes, kids with secret superpowers, a robot who misses his parents, kids who want to fit in, adults who want to escape; these fourth graders have the greatest imaginations! You could hear a pin drop as the students circulated the room to read each others' stories on Friday morning. A true testament to their successes as budding authors!

It is a daunting task, reading so many stories, but I am so impressed! Here are a few snippets:



S sets up The Brother Chronicles with this lead:

Finally, my mom calls me and my brother to dinner. We're eating and as usual my brother always works at trying to make my mom think he's better than me. He says, "your food is way awesome, mom." With her familiar happy look she replies "well thank you, now Jon eat up that spinach." I try to come up with a reply to top his so I can get out of eating spinach. It's hard to come up with a compliment when you're gagging on wet green leaves but I have to top my brother. I say, "mom it is really gogggogg good," as I gag on the leaves. Houdini of course comes back with a "this is triple times better than ever." I can tell where this is headed so I get up and leave the room. He wins again anyway because now Mom is upset with me for not finishing my spinach. For once, I want to be as good as he pretends to be. I don't see why he gets so happy over bothering me! "What's up with that?"



W, who is great at using intentional humor, writes:

"Mom, I'm figuring out how to get super powers!" "Stop trying I'll buy you some later!" "You can't buy superpowers mom!" "Sure you can! They're half off at Wallgreens. Now let's go!"



N describes her car accident scene this way:

"Press the brake" yelled Michella as she was panicking. "Well it looks like she can't even tell which petal it is" said Cassie as she pulled one hand from her face. As soon as she made up her mind, she pressed one of the petals and then the car stopped. All of the girls just sat there. Silence. "We're going to get in so much trouble" said Cassie as she pulled her other hand away from her face.



J, a struggling writer, slows down his story enough to show us this:

In the elevator they heard a beautiful voice coming from the ballroom. When the producer got out of the elevator they followed the voice until they got to the ballroom where they found where the voice was coming from. It was Zach and Cody's mom Kari!



J describes her character's anxiety like this:

"Oh my gosh the cooking project! I totally forgot it." Jessi move to the front of the class slowly as a robot. Am so nervous my mind went blank. All I could think was sing "La La La La La!" .... Oh I thought in my head Why didn't I do my project "says Jessica." Even while the teacher was calling kids up so they could explain their homework and turn in homework. Can you please bring your homework says Mrs. Mcan in a really bad mood. Will will an an an amm "Where is it" says Mrs Mcan. "I left it at home" says Jessica. The teacher says "Well I gave you the easyest homework of this year." The whole classmates laughed, even the teacher.

I love the chance to take in stories like these. They help me realize that even while we have work to do, these kids are learning - they are writing, they are creating, and they are having fun with it!